this is fyf

This weekend, take a mustache ride!

Okay, so there is an event Sunday at Public Assembly called the Brokedown Throwdown and, well, I'll be out of town so I really haven't done much research.  What I do know is that there will be something called the Mustache Ride and that it looks super fun (or at least sounds super fun).  Based on the concept art above all I can possibly do is endorse this Mustache Ride and hope that you can take a ride on this moustache or something similar. 

And by Brooklyn, he means WILLIAMSBURG. (And by Manhattan he means that exclusive island getaway for global billionaires. Clearly.)

#RichPeoplesFight

Via (and a new Facebook friend! Thanks!)

PACT Gallery in Williamsburg has inaugural exhibition tonight.

PACT is a new arts and community action center committed "to supporting emerging artists, activists, video gamers and local community members". Tonight from 6 to 9 will be their first exhibit with artists C. Finley, Rachael Warner, Zavé Martohardjono and Dustin Piper (above) and more. Sandbox, 257 Grand Street, Williamsburg

What to do: this weekend

This.

First? It's cold. Bundle up...and I'm not even saying that 'cuz I'll be doing coat-check at Snaxx (Westside Tavern. All the way to the back. See you at 10pm? 10:30? 11? Come when you're ready.).

Not this.

Earlier, there's a Toys for Tots thing that's not Toys for Tots -- however that works (The organizers were scolded by the Marines for calling it that, apparently?), and this Toys for Tots thing that's not allowed to be called Toys for Tots is THE place to see and be seen from what I hear...sort of like Cherry's in Cherry Grove?

Like Cherry's, it's a wonderful place to get a drink - the event is one long open bar...though every open bar I've ever been to has actually been a pretty fucking miserable place to get a drink because of all the queens crowding, elbowing and generally giving all kinds of entitled realness effeckssscksckss trying to get their measly shot glass of juice w/ splash of vodka.

Wait...did I mention there's an open (beer) bar at Snaxx from 10-11pm? No? Well there is and...ignore what I just said about open bars, 'k? Seriously, if there's an open bar I WILL go to, it's Snaxx'. 

Also, I've never been to the Not-Toys-for-Tots-"Toys for Tots" event myself, so you really shouldn't base any of your expectations about the event or the attendees on anything I've said. Clear?

Ok. So there's NTFTTFT, Snaxx...and Clubber Down Disco under the Chelsea Hotel with Ryan Smith at the door and my partner-in-crime(s committed long ago) Tai Chi inside. I'm not sure who's spinning tonight, but it doesn't really matter cuz they'll play disco and it'll be cute and that's that.

What else? Let's see...there's Paul Alexander (The Ones) MC-ing again (you know he was one of the MC's for the famed Jackie 60 parties back in the day at Mother?) at a party at Sugarland with DJ Emjay (He of Wonderbar and Starlight fame). 

Also in Williamsburg, Mondo returns just in time for FYF Friend and Fashion contributor Kiger Hansen's birthday. He'll be celebrating Mondo-style (does he do anything any other way?).

If you walk for body, head over to Splash and enter to win $250 at the F*Word in their stripper contest. James Anderson has a new(-ish...I think it's the second one?) party at The Monster, and Gumbo hosts the first of two parties this weekend - this one in DUMBO, Sunday's down in Miami!

There's stuff tomorrow, including Cheryl at Brooklyn Museum's Free Saturdays, a coat/clothing drive at Excelsior in Park Slope, a Hanukkah Pink Mafia for media networking at Julius', Xanadude on Ice at Public Assembly Loft and FYF Contributor Dave Huge's A Very Collider Christmas at Stonewall, and Sunday...but I really don't have to tell you about them, do I? You know to look at the FYF Calendar for more/details by now, surely!

Regardless, stay warm and have a great weekend!

Civilization Progress Report: Men and women with pens will save the entire damn world

Heavens to Zeus! This week has been a delightful blur, hasn't it! Well, it has for me, because--and I feel that after so many weeks of heavy-lifting (what with all the rebuilding of civlization one brick at a time!), I've earned a couple shameless plugs!--I had a lovely little short story about volcanoes and love and death and bodily waste chucked online somewhere! And so in honor of this little feat--and the slightly larger feat of having a collection of my stories out next month--I'd like to dedicate today's report to the incredible men and women who are keeping culture from coming apart at the seams, by writing stories and sharing their art with the world. Because without words, we'd be nothing more than cave dwellers. We'd be nothing more than a pack of wildebeests closely resembling Ke$ha. And wouldn't that be a fright!

• Paulo Coelho's The Alchemist is getting the graphic novel treatment thanks to Derek Ruiz and Daniel Sempere. [GalleyCat]

• HOLY MACKEREL! Neil Gaiman doesn't know who sent him the Home Sushi Kit. [Neil Gaiman]

• In case it wasn't apparent enough by the sprawling, poorly-edited text of the last book, J.K. Rowling will not be writing another Harry Potter book. [The Guardian]

• READY FOR THE WEEKEND!There are a lot of literary events throughout New York City. Very few of them are worth going to. EARSHOT, a Brooklyn-based series curated by Nicole Steinberg, features Eric Nelson, Chris Tarry, and several others tonight. It is absolutely worth going to. [Facebook]

What you wanna do this weekend...

Hey kids! Tonight's predicted to be a blustery one. Don't get flustery however! Here's what to do tonight and the rest of this weekend:

Tonight, (now, actually!) it's all about cute and smart as Mary Literary Quarterly drops it's new issue at Pearl Lounge (not Pearl River) in the heart of "Old" Chelsea (it's not the gay ghetto it once was, is all I mean.). Later, cute and smart continues at Union Hall as Eliot Glazer provides running commentary on a screening of "Riding the Bus with My Sister".

Speaking of cute gays with glasses, the party continues at Bedlam on Ave. C where manly manager Sam hosts and Greg K. and Nicolette see to your entertainment. Should you be seeking something a little more seedy, back over in the numbered avenues (2nd to be precise), Eddie and Stuart Black resolutely contribute to The Cock's infamy with Black Cock (every Friday!).

Tomorrow night, Spank LIVE takes place out in my hood at Littlefield (a truly beautiful space!) and involves pretty much every talented gay (and some not so) out there?! Milan and DaLipstyxx, The Dazzle Dancers, Gio Black Peter, Perfidia...the list goes on! Art by Scooter LaForge, too!

Meanwhile, back over in Chelsea (have you seen it Lately?), Sugar Daddy holds a Game Show Edition. Need I say everyone'll be a winner? Paul Short'll see to that. Gustavo and Bill Pfeiffer provide tunes/themes/gongs.  See video below and BE INSPIRED!

 

Finally...Sunday...major stuff happens elsewhere (Horse Meat Disco 7 year anniversary in London; Patrick Cowley's birthday in San Fran with the Honey boys) but here you can rave silently in Times Square with ex-Mr. Black and current Boiler Room bartender Russell or sample some of DJ Chauncey's  Kielbasa over in (the) Eastern Bloc. 

Also Sunday night, FYF Friend Xavier gives a rare concert with full band at Cameo Gallery in Williamsburg that - at $5 - is worth every cent! He's got a record coming out this fall of Arthur's Landing's "Is It All Over My Face" with Hercules & Love Affair's Nomi Ruiz, so look for that as well. No, I DON'T think the $5 covers that, too. Bitch gotta eat, ok??

P.S. - I think he's a batter.

Check the FYF Calendar for more events and complete details.

Civilization Progress Report: There's a new meat market in Williamsburg and it isn't Sugarland.

So. Some years ago, Welsh rock band Catatonia had a rad song called, "Stone By Stone," and the refrain went something like this: On common ground, we'll build our castle walls / We'll build them stone by stone and how / With more and more, you know it won't take long / Where it burned orange, let it burn gold. And today, we (I?) would do well to take a break from our (once again, my?) usual doomcasting to frame this past week's goings-on in a way that makes us think that this world of ours isn't going to cave in on itself!

• First things first, friends! Kylie Minogue demonstrated spirited heroics by giving American television something it hasn't had in a while: Pop music that makes you feel all ooey, gooey, and great inside. [YouTube]

This week's "This Weekend..." is minimal (in terms of words) for that "no muss, no fuss!" feeling. Hey it's Pride, you want to keep it cute, no?

 
(Everyone's doing a "Hot World Cup Players" thing, and who are we to buck a trend? Best - to us - so far? Best Week Ever's round-up of "...Hot World Cup Players getting Balls to the Face". HuffPo tried to do one, but need to change their prescription...those are the ugliest photos of some of the ugliest players I've seen. My fave - this second - Benny Feilhaber of the USA. Here crooning Jordin Sparks' "No Air" shirtless.)

FRIDAY (Tonight!) -

Ryan Smith and Ron Like Hell's hella fun/cute/easy (I can attest! I was there!) Soffitta70 (I still haven't gotten the full story on the name) is back this Friday and every second Friday from now on. (10pm, Upstairs from Public Assembly)

Another bi-weekly party, Sugardaddy, hosts Unisexi for one night only. (10pm, Rush) Support my "Send Duane to Spain!" campaign June 25th when I'm the guest Sugar for one night only (yes, I'm breaking my retirement. Just like Cher.), along with special guests DJs the Soffitta boys and special mangler (or just special) Jason The Black TeenWolf. He'll be operating a kissing booth or something? Sugarcoated indeed!

Denim Shorts is an invitation to sand your jeans and wear your best clone look (the one on the event page is hard to beat!) to drink cheap beer and hear A. Martini spin rock and roll, glam and punk. (10pm, The Phoenix)

Mr. Mickey and Drew Elliott host Fridays at the Salon with Dangerous Muse and other cute DJs playing cute tunes. How do I know it's cute? Because THAT is just what Mr. Mickey and Drew do. (10pm, Tribeca Grand - Salon)

The weekend continues below...

Spin the Deejays - Ryan Smith & Ron Like Hell

Ron Like Hell (l) and Ryan Smith (r) met the way all deejay duos should - bonding over records at an honest-to-god record store. Their chemistry led to their collaboration with Ashton Anders at the Rocket party at the late, lamented Hose (sob).  At their newest offering, Soffitta70 (tonight, in the anything-goes loft above Public Assembly in Williamsburg), they bring their love of timeless music as well as an aesthetic borne of their passion for all things Italian from the 1960s and 1970s. Last time was totally dope.  We chatted with Ryan and he hit us with some classics. 

How do you organize your music collections?  Ron has over 20,000 records which are organized by genre.  Ryan is just a big ol' mess when it comes to organization but tends to buy music and throw it in his CD book.

What are the top five tracks in your iTunes, all time? Ron seldom uses iTunes and my hard drive recently crashed so it's not completely accurate.  By our own account we'd say:

1. Thompson Twins - "If You Were Here"
2. Dr. Buzzard's Original Savannah Band - "Hard Times"
3. John Martyn - "Big Muff"
4. Mato - "Drifting (Yuzo's Congas Mix)"
5. Marvellettes - "The Hunter Gets Captured by the Game" [click through for amazing record nerd intro]

What's your current typical tech set up for playing out?   Ron has Technic 1210s at home with a Pioneer DJM500 while I have CDJ100's and Numark Pro DXM Battle Mixer.  When playing out - unfortunately in this city, you have to take what you get.   

What requests won't you take? Anything we don't have with us.  

You're bombing.  What's the next track? Ron: anything by Chic, while I'd bust out an irresistible classic.  

Who should play your funeral?   We both live in the moment with a lot to look forward to.  There's too much great music to hear while we're alive!

What are you when you're not a DJ?  Ron is a buyer and sales lady at Permanent Records in Brooklyn.  Ryan does freelance marketing and promotion and is working on a gay tee-shirt line with the homochic boys from SF which will be launching in the coming weeks!

You're trapped on a desert island. Which diva have you brought along to eat?  Princess Toadstool with pineapples on her bitties.  

Ryan and Ron's current top ten:

1. Stereo Total - "Tour De France"
2. Rapination & Kim Mazelle - "Love Me The Right Way (New York Blizzard Mix)"
3. Sheena Easton - "101 (Steve Travolta edits)" 
4. Serge Gainsbourg - Marabout (Bob Sinclar mix)
5. Caribou - "Bowls"
6. Norma Jean Bell - "Mystery (Original Mix)"
7. Donkeyboy - "Sometimes (Of Norway Version)"
8. Street Hero - "End of the World (Honey Soundsystem Remix)"
9. Zander VT - "Changes"
10. Deee-Lite -  "Build The Bridge"

If you can't make it tonight, fear not - Soffitta70 is set for a second-Fridays residency, and the duo will also be playing the Pride edition of Sugar Daddy next Saturday night. You can also check out their stylings on Mister Smith's Soundcloud. ("I Brought My Problems to the Dance Floor" is Mister Smith solo, and "Fire Island Tops" is the matched set). 

Mister Dave Hughes has lived in Chinatown, the East Village, Tribeca, Long Island City, and Harlem, and he currently hangs his hat in Williamsburg. He likes politics, disco and whiskey. His writing has also appeared in Slant, New York Magazine, and other fine publications.

Civilization Progress Report: Courtney Love and Amanda Lepore protest the oil spill by putting together something even more offensive.

Well wasn't this week slightly horrible and painful for all involved? We learned this week that we've got to love our President even if it means that the only thing he can do to British Petroleum is put his finger in their wine and glower at them before turning his attention elsewhere. And if he's going to be this dignified about taking to task an oil giant whose negligence stands a good shot at going transatlantic and contaminating some major European waterways, then perhaps we ought to seek more effective leadership. Like a deranged woman who seems to have forgotten about her daughter and is now posting unsavory photo-ops of herself on Facebook. Empty out your lunches, strap your brown paper bags to your face, and dry heave! It's time for some CPR.

This weekend...

Queens Pride is this weekend!

So...if you haven't been keeping up on Facebook/wherever...there's a (VIRULENT!) rumor that Ms. Minogue will make an appearance at the F Word's reactivation at Splash tonight. Personally? It all sounds too much like a PR wet dream, but I look forward to receiving first hand reports/twits/stat updates! Question though...why do these pop princesses ONLY show up at Splash?! Used to be the Roxy was the spot, now it's Splash?! What's the common element here, gayleuths? Give us the tea!

Pyromaniacs, hose lovers and hotties at Pyrophilia in deepest Greenpoint tonight. The venue is t.b.d Bar and sounds super cute! Part of an ongoing series from The Blood Dumpster. Sounds very Dexter!

Also in the wilds of Brooklyn (Deepest Bushwick to be exact), Mark Louque and Miss Pappas bring you XOO at Tandem Bar with special guest Michael Magnan. Crunchy, crusty fun!

On the opposite side of town and with (perhaps?) a little less edge/crunch, but as much soul/steeping (makes a good tea!), Snaxx at Westside Tavern (Back of the bar, down the stairs...DANCE!) is earthside on its bi-weekly transit.

Just up 8th Avenue, who knew Upright Citizens' Brigade was up so late!? Funny folkster Ben Lerman performs with t h i n s k i n j o n n y. Funny songs is what you'll hear. Funny ha ha. 11:30pm is showtime!

The weekend continues below...

This weekend... (If you're not Bear-ing all)

   
Image that came up when I googled "Shaved Bear".  Maybe he's the tattoo artist?

Tonight: 

Mr. Mark DeMaio is a painter friend and is showing his paintings at ViG 27, where Corey TuT will play a set for our entertainment.  (8pm)

Unitard returns to NYC at Comix for a one night only encore. (8pm)

Lady and Roxy Cottontail are making heads roll at Bar 13 (the just-announced "secret" Spank Rock performance will really kill!)! (10pm)

Andy the Barber is heading to P-Town for the season so Code at the Eagle is hosting a Barber Blitz as a send-off. (10pm)

This weekend (Too much to fit in!*)...

 

---Tonight (Friday):

New photographic works by Jeremy Kost and others at Winkleman Gallery through June 12. (Opening tonight, 6-8pm)

Snaxx hosts a birthday party for DJ Paul Ferrer (remember?). (Westside Tavern @ 10pm)

Unisexi's been doing it for a year already (Le Royale @ 10pm), while Skittles is giving High School and going out with a (New Wave) Prom. (The Outpost @ 10pm)

Josh Sparber and Jiggly Caliente turn (white?) Sugarland out (Sugarland @ 10pm), while Mark Louque (really) guest DJs downstairs at Black Cock (The Cock @ 11pm).

---Tomorrow night (Saturday):

Kenny Kenny's solo photography show, 'Bon Vivant in New York', opens at Collective Gallery (View a small selection of photographs from the show after the jump.) (Opening is from 6pm - 8pm at the Gallery), and  Family Function hosts the after party. (Woody's @ 10pm)

Meanwhile, across town, Crisis celebrates Vandam door goddess Cynthia Powell's birthday with nightlife legends Johnny Dynell and Leee Black Childers guest djing. The Legends and Nightlife Gods/Goddesses theme also ties in to Crisis' role as  supporter of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center where a special Studio 54 anniversary edition of Dance 208 takes place just prior to Crisis.

Last but not least, San Francisco art collective HomoChic makes their debut visit to New York to team up with SPANK for Interlace NYC, part of Earl Dax' week long Queer Conscience happening. (The Loft @ 10pm) 

They have a (truly) lovely video flyer here. More info on HomoChic here, and on Queer Conscience here.  This is heady stuff, kids...our CPR (Civilization Progress Report) is boosted by their CPR (Center for Performance Research).

---Sunday night:

Josh Woods presents Rooftop Bares! at Hudson Terrace. FYF - this is affiliated with Broadway Bares and not next weekend's Urban Bear Weekend. Josh's summer Sunday shindig at Hudson Terrace, Rooftop, begins May 23rd. (Hudson Terrace @ 6pm)

* -- I lied...I WAS able to fit it all in.

Note: Check out the FYF calendar for more information/events.

Tonight (Thursday is the new...Nevermind.)

TONIGHT:

Big Apple Dodgeball (B.A.D.) is going 80s at the Eagle where they'll be joined (on the roof) later in the evening by a contingent of Mr. Blevins' fans, friends and well-wishers celebrating his visit from L.A. later.  (7pm, The Eagle)

Mr. Alejandro is following Mr. Blevins' example and moving out west. As a goodbye, he's co-hosting Josh Wood's Fox at The Park tonight where he'll be accepting well-wishers as well! (10pm, The Park)

Dueling Dance Dens round out the night's offerings as Deputy and Sean B. give a retro-futuristic feel a la Disco at Xanadude (Flaming Swords Battle!) at K&M Bar in Williamsburg, while Michael Magnan, Nita and the Palms Out crew (Jason Pants and Chaz Requina) welcome House of Stank at a new location for The Beat, the Fat Baby basement. (10pm, K&M Bar & 11pm, Fat Baby)

Statistics determine the best neighborhood in New York for the homosexual man.

The title of best neighborhood in New York is regularly handed out using different criteria each time.  The latest entry into this unwinnable argument is the newest issue of New York magazine.  The annual "Neighborhood" boasts a "livability calculator"  as created by the much esteemed Nate Silver.  Yes, THE Nate Silver that predicted with amazing accuracy the turnout of the 2008 presidential elections.  (A personal disclaimer about Nate Silver:  A guy that is a statistics genius is perhaps the dream lover that I will never have.  Math geniuses could go to the front of the line, if, like, there was a line.  Sigh.) 

Their result is that Park Slope is the best neighborhood in New York.  This is completely true and accurate.  If you are a white girl with a baby bump and banker husband and you are want that little baby bump to end up at a great school.  Our result varies, greatly.

The problem is, as referenced above,  that Silver's weighting of the criteria is highly heteronormative.  By making adjustments reflecting some homonormative values to every one of the twelve criteria in the livability calculator, we had a different result that pushed Park Slope from number one to seven.  And the new winner?  The East Village.  

(Note, of course, the adjustments made were suitable to my homosexual lifestyle.  Yours, of course, may vary.)

- Affordability/Housing:  More important!  The budget for travel and nice things in the home and the closet exceeds the desire to pay a landlord.
- Transit/Proximity:  Less!  Walking or biking is often a better alternative, so that extra block or two is okay.
- Shopping:  More!  Those nice things for the home and closet, remember?  
- Safety/Crime:  Less!  Just slightly lowered, but guys tend to worry a bit less about this issue than ladies or moms.
- Restaurants:  More!  
- Schools:  Totally wiped this one out!  Seriously, keep those kids away from my house.
- Diversity:  About the same.
- Creative Capital:  More!  The neighborhood without inspiration is just a place to live, and that's it.
- Housing Quality:  Less!  We can handle the renovations ourselves, thanks.
- Green Space:  More!  For all that walking and biking mentioned above.
- Health & Environment:  About the same.
- Bars & Nightlife:  More!  Because we just like to go out and have some fun.  

Again, you can change the priorities on the calculator yourself, and hopefully share them in the comments.  With our fine tuning, the neighborhoods for the homosexual man in New York, presented in order of livability:

1. East Village
2. Lower East Side
3. DUMBO/Downtown Brooklyn
4. Cobble Hill/Boerum Hill
5. Red Hook
6. Carroll Gardens/Gowanus
7. Park Slope
8. West Village/Meatpacking
9. Nolita/Little Italy
10. Tribeca

Congratualions, Williamsburg!  You're (maybe) getting a strip mall!  With a a pharmacy, an electronics shop, a convenience store, and a restaurant!  Maybe it'll be a Red Lobster, renamed Redd Lobstr for neighborhoodiness!

This Weekend...

 
 Malcolm McLaren

...Snaxx returns as if from the heavens (Friday, 10pm, Westside Tavern basement), DJs Bill Coleman and Lina were birthed at F Word where they're The Ones (Friday, 10pm, Rebel), Sparber and Ladosha are giving me a banjee effeck when they Move It (Friday, 11pm, Sugarland), Ricardo Studmuffin brings a dance party to the Eagle (Saturday, 10pm, The Eagle), Amanda Lepore is/is not in CRISIS (Saturday, 10pm, Elevate) Family Function continues to DYS all haters (Saturday, 10pm, Woody's), House's roots are showing at Trippin' on the Moon 4 (Saturday, 10pm, Santos Party House) while its legends continue to age (Danny Krivit's Birthday/718 Sessions - Sunday, 6pm, Santos Party House) and sister homo-pub GAYLETTER enters "midlife" to tunes from Michael Magnan and Telfar (Sunday, 10pm, Hiro),  

Other things happening this weekend (and just slightly less obviously gay/cruisy?): 

• Dunno him well, but Mr. John J. Zullo has a dance company that's performing at a festival happening in Long Island City this weekend (who knew?) and - shallowly - he's hot and looks extremely flexible (Saturday, 8 - 9pm, Green Space Studio) 
• Malcolm McLaren's death this week sent me down the Wiki rabbit hole after details of his life and others of his ilk. There, I learned a lot more about Jayne County ("Legendary!" was the previous extent.) that only increased my respect for her. I'll leave you to trace the degrees of separation, but a weekend long event at the Chelsea Hotel is named in her honor and is displaying some of her artwork. (Friday - Sunday, Chelsea Hotel - Opening event at 8pm on Friday)
• Speaking of queer rock and post-punk...QxBxRx may be showcasing the next wave this weekend? (Saturday, 10pm, Cake Shop)
• Girlfriend Greg Lockard and co-creator Mike DiMotta are debuting their new comic book  "Miss Thing Werk" at the Museum of Comic and Cartoon Art Fest 2010 this weekend. Hi-larious! Congrats, boys! (Saturday & Sunday, 11am-6pm, 69th Regiment Armory)

And to all your birthday boys out there, Happy Birthday!

Image via

Is Kylie Minogue moving to Williamsburg?

Williamsburg doesn't seem rather Kylie, does it?  Apparently it will be for the next few months as our tipster reports Ms. Minogue will be  "subletting a furnished loft in Williamsburg , maybe longer ".  

Will Kylie go to Enid's?  Metropolitan?  Pete's Candy Store?  Will the Williamsburg Welcome Wagon send her a basket of American Apparel and ironic sunglasses?  
 

Williamsburg residents are boycotting the coming Bedford Avenue branch of Duane Reade.  We support this completely, as regular readers might surmise.

Sugarland

• 221 North Ninth Street, Williamsburg    Map