this is fyf

The "post Super Bowl" victory sex ad that you suspected would be up on Craigslist is indeed up on Craigslist.

Here is Madonna's halftime show from the Super Bowl.

This probably will be pulled soon, but what the heck.

Internet undecided on what makes a Madonna (cocktail).

Are you throwing a Super Bowl party with a Madonna theme?   You can root for the New York Giants or the Provincetown Patriots and you've got the Madonna half time show.  The problem is what to serve for such a party.  One one-hand you have stadium/tailgate choices which are perfect for a winter Sunday.  On the other hand you have Madonna who is macrobiotic which is, like, healthy and would be surprising to your guests. (My guests would leave, for sure.)

Instead, let's focus on a theme drink for the party.  A Madonna cocktail would be appropriate, but The Internet cannot seem to decide what that exactly is.

 

 

Our first Madonna is a complex fix of Vodka (1 1/3 ounces), Peach and Kiwi Liquers (1/2 ounce each), and Blue Curacao (1 teaspoon).  All are stirred with ice and strained into a chilled cocktail glass and then garnished with a sprig or mint.  It sounds complex and it probably works out, but with all those liquers going on, my worry is sick stomachs and nasty blue stains on my bleached coir area rug.

 

 

 

 

Our next Madonna option is as simple as the previous was complex. A shot of cherry vodka is added to 7-Up and garnished with a single maraschino cherry.  While all the cherry action adds to your "Like A Virgin" thing, perhaps your guests will find this to be a little on the "Sandra Lee" side of the equation.

 

 

 

 

As neither "Madonna" is amazing, the search was made for "Madonna's favorite cocktail" instead.  This turned up what might be a winner,  a pomegranate martini.  Fill your shaker with 1 1/2 ounces of vodka, 1 ounce each of pomegranate and cranberry juices, 1 1/2 ounces of blueberry puree, and ice.  Garnish with lemon and you're set!  Sure it's still going to stain that rug if spilled, but it's for Madonna.

 

Still not sold?  I'm thinking you could just have a well-stocked bar, and put out some recipe cards with drinks with names like "Ray of Light", "Express Yourself", "Burning Up", and "Bedtime Stories" and still have a happy crowd. 

Here are two things related to Madonna hosting the Super Bowl.

 

1.  Either House of Ninja will be in the show or created choreography for the show.

 

2.  The first television ad is out:

 

I just received a "special" birthday message exclusively for me from Brett Favre.

Or...it would be "exclusively" for me if I were Duane Frisbie. I've been receiving emails for random Duane's - or not even Duane's! - for some time now...all to my regular gmail address. Apparently the registration process for getting a gmail account is not so airtight and duplication free as we've been led to believe.

Back to Brett - I have to admit I was mildly disappointed at the amount of clothes he's wearing and the tight focus on the upper portion of his body. Maybe - had the message truly been an exclusive one to me, Duane ROGGENDORFF - it might have been of an altogether different nature after all. That said, (and given I've already seen the Favre "goods") I'm not terribly disappointed with the "special" message actually sent.

Well...not terribly disappointed there's no money shot, but in terms of content and effort? This shit is LAME! Maybe it means next to nothing to me because a) it's not my birthday/isn't actually to me, and b) I'm not a big sports fan...or a big enough fan of anyone really to put much stock in a two second greeting from my "idol" on my birthday, but does this work for people? Do any of you loyal FYF readers buy into this stuff and,  if so (or even if not), can you explain it so I understand why it's meaningful?

What if I have some as yet undiagnosed form of Asberger's Syndrome that renders sports meaningless and unintelligible to me?

I like Mark Sanchez more and more...

See, he's the subject of another interview in this month's GQ (he was last interviewed by the magazine in 2009) in which he comes across as a genuinely good - if slightly thick-headed - guy who seems to have his priorities better placed than most. Rather than worrying how he looks in a photo shoot that accompanies his interview - which is for a men's fashion magazine (or "fashion" depending on how closely your income is linked to the fashion industry.) with the styling, advertorial concerns and everything else that entails - Sanchez smartly deflects any wrongheaded attempts at belittling him for looking good in tight jeans by re-focusing the conversation on a true embarrassment for him: his performance in the previous week's game and then deftly moves on to how he will work to correct that.

As a rule, I have little patience for the aggressively homophobic (but actually hyper-insecure), unapologetically neanderthalic sports world and particularly for its players, but - with this one - I'm willing to cut him some slack. And no, it's not because he's a show tunes fanatic.

Also, Aaron Rodgers has a pencil dick and fuck you, commenter mrw55, for still thinking that an affinity for musicals and show tunes indicates anything more than...an affinity for musicals and show tunes!?

In all seriousness, my primary irritation with all of this is the fact that it's even a story. Why? Because in being published, this just perpetuates the idea that Sanchez has anything whatsoever to be ashamed of in wearing clothes that fit, which further perpetuates a permeating element of sports culture in general - and, ultimately, the concept of manhood itself - which is the idea that our masculinity is constantly called into question and must be proved EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY by completing asinine "tests" like not flinching when someone punches you, denying you've ever enjoyed the sound of music that isn't Pantera or Santana(??) (or enjoyed The Sound of Music, period!) and a thousand other patently ridiculous "proofs" that have nothing to do with being truly manly and everything to do with being a lemming who'll follow anyone off a cliff for fear of being ridiculed.

Oxymorons of the recession: Bottle service half-off. Or, why I don't cover "the news".

Another "tempting" deal...

So..."The News" is Rod's thing. I can't watch/listen/read for fear of losing my already tenuous grip on sanity/optimism/any reason to get up in the morning (See this for an example of both why I have my head in the sand and what I might write were I to try and take on current "events". Upon reading, I think you'll agree the "news" aspect of FYF is best left to Rod.).

Perhaps more "topically", someone either utterly clueless or the victim of a recent birth (and a paucity of nightlife history) wrote a post on LA's Guest of a Guest about Gilt Poop/Lifehooker/Bloomtwat/Dupe-on offering a "deal" on bottle service at night clubs, warning it could "ruin nightlife as we know it".

Oh, if only it could be ruint any further, dear. That is, any "nightlife" associated with an establishment that offers bottle service, anyway.

Meanwhile I, too, had noticed bottle service "deals" popping up in my inbox recently and had also mused at the change of fortune (and also the oxymoronic aspects of getting "discount" bottle service!?) once "proud" (i.e. - utterly greedy) nightlife establishments had experienced.

Like the majority of policy decisions being made by leaders - both political and corporate - in the face of the current financial crisis, bottle service always seemed like an incredibly short-sighted stop-gap measure that fully acknowledged it's unsustainability and cynically adopted an "I'mma get minez..."-and-get-out mentality (Hello, 27th Street between 10th and 11th 2005-2009).

So much wrong in such a short post, but...I'm not done!

New York Mag - per usual - brought this whole debacle (...of an article, a "deal" and a sign of the dismal, dismal times in which we live) to my attention (in an article titled "Groupons for Bottle Service: Is Western Civilization as We Know it Over?") , yet it was in its comments where I found the most depressing of all heretofore seen/mentioned evidence of societal moral bankruptcy:

And yet, just as the Guest of a Guest piece was unintentionally factually correct, there's much truth to this comment as I believe the ridiculously extreme level of sports fanaticism exhibited unashamedly in this country (not to mention the ABSURD AMOUNT OF MONEY WASTED - largely - ON GROWN MEN WHO PLAY GAMES!?!?) is a sign of "the end times"! This man's story is but one example of the utter lunacy that has become acceptable OVER COMPLETELY IMAGINARY ALLEGIANCES!?!?

...And we think the English are childish for rioting for 42" plasma screens.

(And yes, I realize the comments were likely tongue-in-cheek. The fact that people had actually analyzed sports teams in relation to the downfall of civilization - as though "good" sports teams somehow ensure a "healthy" society - is the bone I have to pick with the commenters. And America.)