this is fyf

PRIDE 2011: EveryBOOTY - North 6th Pride - Saturday night at Public Assembly.

This happened...along with A LOT of other stuff, of course. But I had it drafted up and ready, yet didn't get to post it and heard it was major!

Thanks kids for putting great, multi-faceted, fun shit like this together.

Thanks New York for taking a big step towards equality for all.

Thanks New York City for indulging us faggots in our (all too rare) moments of self-congratulation, self-acceptance (or our best effort at such, anyway) and celebration of us - just as we are.

Happy Pride (year-round, queens!), kids!

Color - particularly multiple strong ones together - can be tricky.

I missed all the fun yesterday (I'm in Alabama for a family matter. Other family, that is.), but - in the spirit - I admire the skillful use of color shown here.

Hey Ya'll. It's Pride.

The schedule's FILLED! Events OUT THE WAZOO (And in. And out. This IS Pride after all?!)! Tourists and trannies and thongs, oh my! Tellingly(?) Rod and I are both out of pocket this weekend. And yet, we're VERY proud, so...not sure what that fact tells.

Back to the calendar, there's so much to do you need to study up. Browse the FYF Calendar and make a list of your priorities. There's something - quite literally? - for everyone.

Speaking of something for everyone... Old-timers? Remember the track that kicks off this post? I would be willing to swear I had it as a cassingle. And I wore that shit OUT! U2's original? Major. Clivilles + Cole's techno remix? I LIVED!! Did you?

[For the purists and lovers, here's the full version. The track posted above is from the "Gladiator" movie soundtrack and is both shorter and has better sound quality than any full version I could find on YouTube.

U2's original track here (remember when they were young!? My GOD!).]

What. Is. Gay.

Given the giant reaction to the whole GRIDTo thing and that it's Pride Month, why not try to address the question that's being begged, i.e. - What is gay? Some argue it's a relic of a bygone era when homosexuality was a covert activity and dire circumstances created a palpable culture that could be referred to, shorthand, as gay. Others claim it's an ongoing identity, a chosen status as outcast that will endure for as long as we continue choosing it. For me, the question remains unanswered, as I resist adopting an identity solely based on symbols and arguably common interests, yet I understand the problematic aspect of defining myself "in opposition to" anything, or of refusing to belong solely for the sake of refusal.

I aim to write a series of posts, then, in which I explore some of the ideas I have about what gay is, in the hopes that some of you will provide feedback or offer your submissions of your own conceptions of gay and that a healthy dialogue will occur, allowing us to continue honing our understanding of ourselves as gays, wo/men and humans.

So...let's evolve, kids!

Poster via FYF Friend Paul Vitale and Sissydude

Who's got Queens Pride?

I LOVE sexican!

Who else had Queens Pride this past Sunday? I wasn't able to attend, but from the bit I can gather from the world wide interwebs, things in Queens were much as they have been for years: Hot bartenders had boys falling for them, vivacious drag queens turned out in jaw-droppingly intricate gowns and make-up and handsome men glowered - shirtless - from behind smoky-lensed eyeglasses. It's a sight to behold, kids!

Did you attend? Did you snap some shots you'd like to share? Have a story from the day worth recounting? Send them to us and we'll share as part of our ongoing Pride coverage.

Photo via (where there're more of the day's festivities/attendees)

Additional coverage of Queens Pride 2010 worth posting.

...at least in this editor's opinion.

Also via (which - as it so happens - turns out to be FYF friend Jean Paul Zapata's blog. At least we hope you're reading us, Jean Paul!)

Your guide to Queens Pride.

Here's the thing about Queens Pride:  They have it down to a formula out there in Jackson Heights and for the most part, things remain the same every year.  In the interest of laziness, here is last year's guide which essentially tells you all of the information that any post on this Sunday's event would tell you.  (There is the new bar out there, Hombres Lounge which served as a meeting place for me and a Raging Stallion exclusive at one point in the past year so maybe check that out too.)  Also in the interest of laziness, in case you just can't make it out of the house Sunday (and you should as it will be gorgeous out), the stage show will be streamed live.

Photo via.

A brief appreciation of the rainbow.

There is no reason to post this shoe here.  There was a notion of it being the beginning of Pride Month, but this shoe just happens to have the rainbow design.  The rainbow flag as conceived as a pride symbol dates back to 1978.  Before then rainbow flags were seen in labor, peace and other movements.  For most of us though, it is now ubiquitous.  A symbol of safe harbor in a foreign town.  The rainbow might convince you to visit a merchant or restaurant that otherwise was off your radar.  Bemoaned as a flawed design for multiple generations now, it serves it purpose.  While all of those rainbows may not always be attractive, they are visible.  And visibility was sort of the point back in 1978 just as it still is today. Posting that shoe made you look, and think for a second about the rainbow flag, maybe in a different way.  So there was a reason to post this shoe here after all.

In the United States of America, today is Veterans Day.

Veterans Day is celebrated as Armistice Day or Armed Forces Day in other parts of the world, but here, the date both commemorates the day the Armistice that ended World War 1 was signed as well as honors the veterans of all wars the U.S. has fought since.  Back on the first Armistice Day, war was a more formal, organized affair with many "civilities", as opposed to the hostilities, which were formally ended at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918. Very tidy! Perhaps the signers put a lot of stock in numerology or something? Dunno, but it certainly seems too perfect NOT to be portentous.

Back to the veterans part of Veterans Day...just FYF -- according to Wikipedia, there are still three surviving World War 1 veterans (two British and one American); all 109 years of age this year.

There'll be a parade on Fifth Avenue today - and in cities across the Country - in honor of all American veterans, of which there are approximately 24.9 million. Though only three World War 1 veterans remain living and, therefore,  add just three to the total number of surviving American veterans cited above, in researching their number, I was reminded (and astounded anew) that 65 million+ military personnel were involved in World War 1. Also astounding (and horrifying): 9 million+ of those were killed in the course of the war.

When I realized today was Veterans Day, my mind flashed back to a thought I had a few days ago when I noticed a homeless man with a sign that read "Homeless Vet. Please help". I had thought about how it seemed nearly any homeless person I saw with a sign was - according to the sign - a homeless vet. At the time, I pondered the possible ramifications of this observation. Was it being a vet that made someone more likely to be homeless? Or was a person who was more likely to become homeless also more likely to be a vet?

There are a number of assumptions I'm making in simply voicing those questions (e.g. - that homelessness is something to which one can have a "proclivity"; that the armed forces may attract those with proclivities to homelessness, etc.), but it all begs the question: Are we - once again - being utter hypocrites when it comes to our governmental policies towards, and treatment of, the men and women who we send into harm's way to "protect" us (the quotations are merely meant to indicate what they're doing and who they're protecting is somewhat open to interpretation.)? Additionally, are we taking full responsibility for how battle affects an individual psychologically as well as physiologically?

I am not able to verify or even specify what the above photo reflects; i.e. - Where is this taken? Are the number of suicides specific to soldiers in Iraq? Or are they the number of suicides committed by U.S. soldiers (and maybe veterans?) worldwide? Still, the numbers seem to highlight an underlying (now explicit) theme today: that, while soldiers may be well-trained for combat, they struggle with life between conflicts, or after having returned from duty.

Regardless of whether there are better ways to a) defend our nation and b) assist our returning soldiers, today is about honoring those who offered their lives and possibly their sanity/ability to live in society to protect our way of life. Is/was it worth it? Debatable, certainly, but...perhaps in reflecting today (and on days like it) on what a society worth this magnitude of sacrifice would look like, each of us can take actions that will, eventually, shape our nation into something that is -- without question! -- worth it.

The missed connections of Pride - the Village Voice followup.

The Village Voice followed up with the paramours of our Missed Connections of Pride post earlier this week.  Looks like no love was found for the Craigslisters, but don't give up hope, because they haven't:   "I plan on waiting until my heart can wait no more, or until the 7 days when the ad expires."

The missed connections of Pride.

 

• Pride parade: "we cook better than your wives..." - m4m - (West Village)
  "I was walking in the Parade holding a funny sign; thought we had a moment...you had your shirt off, wearing black shorts, you have brown hair, and you're ripped :) i couldn't stop smiling at you, thought i got one back. if you remember me and my sign, send me a message
• Pride Parade Pass Out - m4m - 27 (Chelsea)
  "Hi,  Saw you passed out in the street during the parade, thought you were cute. Maybe drink a little less next time?<> I wrote a website on your chest. Write me back with the name of the website."
• At Eastern Bloc, sculpture and sparks, Pride Sunday - m4m - 31 (East Village)
  This is not a missed connection per se
  But a missive to the universe, I suppose
  For we exchanged names and I gave you my number
  After you kissed my hand, causing me to shiver
  First I saw you sans T-shirt in suspenders
  Then as you proceeded to chop at the sleeves
  Your eyes held me, close, closer than an embrace
  I caressed you without saying please...
  We bonded over art, or was it some wayward remark?
  I loved your friends turban, but more your spark
  Would love to hear from you, am kicking myself
  For not getting your number, but at least I gave mine
  Did not realize that I would go to bed then
  Thinking of your lips on my hand
  Or the sudden weirdness in my heart
  So this message is to you, to the space out there
  A hope that you felt it too....
  And will respond to the call... with one of your own.
  -- Sunday of Pride...

Pride? The Steve Winick Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

For his second response, Steve Winick takes us on a trip down memory lane with a photographic reminiscence on Pride Marches past. Keep your eye out for familiar faces!:

   
  

Pride? The Sean Safford Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride. From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Mr. Sean Safford is a professor of economics at the University of Chicago's Graduate School of Business, a current P-Town resident and native New York (State)-er who gives us this take:

I became a homo standing on top of a phone booth at the corner of 57th and 5th Avenue, June 26, 1994.

That was not the day I first kissed a boy. My first physical encounter happened in middle school and then a little more seriously some time in 1992.

But on June 26, 1994, I stood on top of a phone booth and a guy standing next to me on the next booth over shouted “Armistead! You changed my life!” as the cast and crew of Tales of the City walked by led by the series/books’ author Armistead Maupin.

I lived in New York the summer before. Like Matthew Brodrick’s character in Torch Song Trilogy, I had come to New York to be gay. I met my first boyfriend, Gregg, in the crowd following the ’93 Pride Parade to the pier (though we never made it to the water) and was off to the races: my first boy-on-boy romance.

I started seeing someone else when I got back to Ithaca in the fall. Eric and I spent our senior years of college going through the motions of being a guy-on-guy couple. I was a budding homo. But even after two relationships, I wasn’t actually a homo yet.

That winter, PBS aired Tales of the City and I – along with a whole lotta other boys (and not a few girls) – were glued to the tube. There, on PBS of all places, was something really cool and fun and well written. But most importantly, I recognized myself in it. And I recognized other people too… I started getting an inkling of where I fit among the gay.

But even that wasn’t enough to make me a homo. It didn’t really come together until that afternoon in New York. I was in town for Pride, the 25th anniversary of Stonewall (the parade that year had a different route, from the UN to Central Park). In the presence of hundreds of people, this stranger stood up on that booth and shouted down to Armistead.

Magic happened: I and a bunch of people around us recognized what this guy felt. We understood it, completely.

I realized then that being gay wasn’t just about getting romantic with another guy. It was about sharing a set of experiences.  Tales of the City was a moment when tons and tons of homos experienced something special, and we experienced it together. And for me, it really gelled at that moment in that Pride parade as I realized that we, the homo, are a tribe and that I was proud to be part of it. Still am.

Pride? The Mac Folkes Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride. From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Multi-city nightlife legend, Renaissance man and catwalk expert Mac Folkes gives us a truly inspired tribute for "Pride?": 

 

Pride? The Khary Polk Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Writer, deejay, and Ph.D. candidate in American Studies at NYU, Mister Khary Polk will be in Berlin for the rest of the summer finishing his dissertation on the travels of African American soldiers around the world. Here's his take:

A good friend of mine believes Berlin’s denizens dream of New York City while New York’s queers dream of Berlin. With this in mind, I’d have to say my own dreams for Pride 2010 exist somewhere in the space between two of my favorite YouTube video clips featuring the recent political activism of queer theorist Judith Butler in Germany and the bodies of black Californians dancing their asses off to Jimi Hendrix circa 1973.

Earlier this month, Judith Butler shocked the city of Berlin (and the larger queer world) by declining an award for civil courage given to her by the organizers of the Christopher Street Day Parade during Berlin’s Gay Pride. Arguing that the event had become too commercial, Butler said—in German, boo—that the award would be better served recognizing organizations that expressly and unabashedly fought for the rights of immigrants, queers of color, and trans folk in Germany, including GLADT, LesMigraS, SUSPECT, and ReachOut. Watching the clip, I became incredibly moved by the crowd’s cheers as Judy enumerated the challenges that continue to face queer people of all stripes throughout our world.

 

The second clip in question is a video and music mash up of the Jimi Hendrix/Curtis Knight song “Happy Birthday” layered over footage of black people dancing taken from the film Wattstax (1973). Originally conceived as a concert film commemorating the seventh anniversary of the Watts riots in Los Angeles, Wattstax became, in the words of director Mel Stuart, “a deeper reflection of the black experience.”  While Hendrix never actually played at Wattstax, I find something so moving in this fusion of song and video, a two-minute tour de force where Afros and booties groove unrepentantly, necks pop and bodies run and come together in celebration of a life that had ended only three years earlier.

As different as these two clips may seem to some people, together they articulate perhaps the fullest expression of pride I’ve ever felt as a person who happens to be black; as a man who happens to be gay; and as a human who feels blessed to be both.

Critique is rarely ever easy to give or receive, and good people shouldn’t have to go to war over Gaza, Gaga or gay marriage. Yet there are times when offense must be taken. After that, let’s hug it out on the dance floor. Because if I can’t dance, I don’t want to be part of your revolution.

Pride? The Scott McMahan Response

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Makeup and grooming artist Scott McMahan has been seen around these parts before and will hopefully be seen again soon.  Here's his take: 

A few weeks ago my partner, Jorge, told me that he had never seen the '70's sitcom, Soap. For Christ's sake, Jodie Dallas was the first openly gay character on a weekly TV series! I added Soap to our Netflix instant viewing queue lickety split, and we got to watching. 

As much as I enjoyed revisiting the Campbells and Tates, I was kind of shocked by the kind of gay bashing in the name of comedy they got away with. It made me think.

Pride? The Steve Winick Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Pantone expert and breast aficionado, Steve Winick, provides us a colorful story for Pride. MMMMMmmm!: 

 

Pride? The Ben Lerman Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

New York based comedian and musician Ben Lerman has entertained all over the country, including performances for Pride celebrations.  Here's his take:

To me, Gay Pride will forever be a lady spilling out of teeny shorts and a halter-top thrusting her arms out in protest, a rainbow flag in each hand, wildly yelling “Boo! Boo!” in my general direction.

In 2004, I was playing bass and singing in a 4-piece comedy rock band called the Isotoners. (myspace.com/isotoners) We were carving out a little name for ourselves. The Village Voice chose us for the cover of the music section of their annual “Best of New York” issue. We were drawing 60 to 100 people at our shows in decent music clubs like the Mercury Lounge. After a packed show at Barracuda—they rented a full PA system just for our show!—we were approached by the Heritage of Pride entertainment director to perform on the Gay Pride stage. None of us even knew there was an entertainment stage at Pride. None of us ever planned to go to Pride. We’re just not the marching or parade going type. But playing to a large crowd sounded like fun and great exposure to new audiences. But maybe we performed best to smaller crowds.

We arrived for sound check, and I glimpsed impending failure. First, to accommodate the many dance acts on the bill, they put our equipment at the rear of the chrome flatbed stage that jutted out lengthwise, distancing us at least 30 feet from the front edge. The flatbed was at about 40 feet from the audience. Then at sound check, there were serious issues. We couldn’t hear ourselves in the monitors, and there was no time to get it right.

The last Sunday in June is almost always unbearably hot and humid, and as the day dragged on, so did our spirits. The other acts were more standard Gay Pride fare—drag queens, dance crews, dance divas, a funk band, a lesbian folk band, and the requisite pants-less appearance by Houston Bernard and his abdominal muscles. We knew that our frumpy quartet, a cross between Pansy Division, Weird Al, and Bare Naked Ladies was going to be a tough sell under the best of circumstances.

We finally took the stage, following a fat drag queen who killed with a Beyoncé lip synch number, and circumstances were terrible. Throughout our first song, the lead vocal was inaudible. The guitar was cutting in and out. The bass was too loud. During the second song, the vocals cut in and out. This is a death sentence to any band, but especially one whose main focus is funny lyrics and pretty harmonies. The crowd of about a thousand people were as patient as could be expected, looking at a band they couldn’t hear, pushed 70 feet away from the front row.

It was hard to get through that performance, and at the end I saw her there in the front row on the right side. I can’t be sure if she was booing my band, booing the shitty sound that continued to cut in and out, or booing the myriad events that led her and me to share this moment. But I’m sure of her sentiment. Every fiber of her being was booing, her flabby bottom-arms jelly rolling in the opposite direction of her gesticulations, her curly weave, her heavy bosom. Even the rainbow flags, one in each hand, veritable symbols of unity and pride, thrusted out in anger and shame, decidedly booing. I couldn’t help but agree with that lady and her rainbow flags. Boo! Boo, indeed.

Pride? The Desi Santiago Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Party legend, one-half of electro-dance sensation Escandalo and artist extraordinaire, Desi Santiago submits this howling tribute to Pride and the freak/feminine/masculine/lupine/any and everything inside us all:  

Pride? The Landry Response.

For Pride 2010, we asked an eclectic group for their take on Gay Pride.   From living to loathing, the responses cover a wide spectrum - a rainbow of opinion, perhaps?

Our friend and contributor Landry is beyond the labial labels of lesbian or dyke or wife or macaroni salad queen, and she has a take on pride that goes beyond the expected:  

I will sometimes make the argument that it's not necessary for us to have marriage rights. 99.9% of the time I'm just being a devil's advocate (asshole) but sometimes it's because I think about how well we have done creating families on our own and without the approval of the masses; we just do it like some sort of superpower honed over centuries and out of necessity. 

The real beauty of it is that we have had no real role models. Our relationships may be similar to our parents in that we love each other but that is where the similarities stop, which makes us lucky. We get to make our own life structures; create our own traditions and ceremonies; map our own lives without any predetermined path cut for us. 

And we do! Many of my friends have created relationships that work for them. That may mean keeping separate apartments or having open relationships. For most heterosexual people, those options are not only "not on the menu", they are not even on their radar even though those may be the things that could work for them and keep them together for the long haul. 

I worry about what government recognized status will do to that spirit and the creative approach, not so much for my generation, but for the ones after. 

The  importance for young gay people to have role models is so that so they don't feel alone, but it is my hope that the example we set isn't one of cookie-cutter, hetero-matrimony. I guess it is my hope that we *will* change the definition of marriage and be the role models for everyone. 

My pride comes from being part of a tribe that makes the rules because they are unable or unwilling to follow the ones that someone else has set. My plan is to keep making my own story, one that doesn't look like anyone else's.