this is fyf

How do you pronounce "envelope"?

Also: there is only one copywriter working in "news" today.

(Andy - rightfully - gets the last laugh.)

Writing a truly good headline takes talent.

This is not a good headline.

Also. I'm still wondering what they meant?

Via which is probably via Mike Dawson or some other Buzz-y boy. Can't recall exactly whom at the moment.

I'd so like to know the back-story for how this came to be published.

Via who asks us to note the name of the columnist in the "N" column...

Not everyone is feeling the new Doughnut Plant.

Sexpigeon:

"This is so, so, so slow. Needlessly. The donuts are already made. What Doughnut Plant has innovated is a doofus that operates at one-third the efficiency of an ordinary donut shop worker. There are three such doofuses, and in tandem their inabilities multiply: the guy who labels the donuts does so incorrectly, mucking-up the donut-packer’s slow, methodless packing, which itself is delayed by the register girl’s jittery approach to the ten-key. And that is how is takes thirty minutes to fill seven donut orders."

I'd link to Doughnut Plant but I'm not sure I want them to find this. It's newly opened in the Chelsea Hotel. People photograph donuts there. There's also one on the Lower East Side. There is buzz.

Civilization Progress Report: Ophiuchus rising!

He-he-hello to 2011, fair readers! With 2010 shrinking far away in our rearview mirrors, let's look to the future. Let's also think about New Year's Resolutions. One of my resolutions was to get back into the gym, if only to keep in time with Nicole Scherzinger's "Poison" while on the ellipticals (check!) Another resolution? To shelve the thunderstormy doomsday theories of 2010. Y'all know bad things happen in the world, but let's vow to laugh and dance and eat P'zones and high-five despite it all. Deal?

• One of the best reasons you can have in January to finally get that digital converter box for your old TV set is the return of the Amy Poehler-led Parks & Rec next Thursday night. Below, she sings "Poker Face"--first at a gay bar and then at her desk. Good times!

It's not WHAT you say, it's HOW you say it.

Proving this point, Fox News Vice President Bill Sammon sent a memo to Fox News staffers and on-air personalities reminding them to use the term "government-run plan" whenever possible instead of "the public option". You're probably scratching your head saying, "But Duane? Why is this news? Of COURSE an executive at Fox News would encourage his on-air staff to use a less favorable term for something they're against." and I'm right there with you, but - despite all evidence to the contrary - a large percentage of Americans continue to believe that FOX is the source for un-biased and "fair and balanced" reporting when it comes to the news media!? (I know, I know...preaching to the choir here, but STILL!?)

Mugshot survey uncovers unlikely hero?

So this blog down in Miami - the Miami New Times - posted its first ever "Mugshots Friday"  where they "curated" (isn't that what everyone's doing these days? e.g. - "I just curated this outfit from the clothes in my closet!") the "best" mugshots from the previous two weeks of booking down in Miami/Dade County.

Tabloid-ish as such a post may be already, one fellow in particular presented a truly sensationalistic sight due to the "flattened" nature of his head. Though we don't know the circumstance that led to his current appearance, we do know that the fellow was apprehended on charges of soliciting a prostitute.

Response to his photo was so great, the Miami New Times posted additional items that dealt solely with his story, reporting that he was fairly well known around certain parts of town and had been arrested multiple times (there were additional mug shots from those occasions) for offenses ranging from disorderly intoxication to burglary.